Etcetera

Debbie Dingell posts about a task still too tough, 16 months into widowhood

June 28, 2020, 3:31 PM

Rep. John Dingell, who died at 92 in February 2019, occasionally is part of "Covid diary" posts each morning by Congresswoman Debbie Dingell on her personal Facebook page. They were married 38 years.
Sunday's entry opens with reflections on weekend housecleaning and an emotional chore she hesitates to confront. (It's lightly edited for readability.)

By Debbie Dingell

The townhouse here in Dearborn has had very little attention for years because I am never here. So I'm cleaning out the freezer and donating size 2 and 4 clothing, which has zero chance of ever fitting again.

I try to think if there is anything of John's in Washington or here I can begin to give away. I cannot get myself there yet.


A Washington power couple, the Dingells were married nearly four decades. (Photos: ABC News)

I know they would help others. I clearly know someday I need to clean them out.

In Washington, I am too busy to think about it. Here I haven't seen them or at least focused on them in a while and I just am not ready.

A colleague and good friend said to me this week: "You still wear your wedding ring?" I said of course – I have had the love affair of my life and I am not taking if off.

I looked up the etiquette of wearing your wedding ring after your spouse dies and the book says: "Many widows or widowers choose to continue to wear their wedding ring for some time. Some wear it for the rest of their life. They might do it because it makes them feel safe. Or because they still feel married.”

For me it's both.

Don’t know why I am talking about this, but my daily writing always reflects what is on my mind.


The dean of the U.S. House and the woman who has filled his seat since 2015.



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